Express The Sensual

Kiki wrote: I was wondering about a good solution to hiding cellulite during a performance.  I’ve seen pole dancers wear fishnets and even do advanced moves with them (inversions, etc.)  I would feel better if I had something on my legs.  Any advice?

Dear Kiki,
I totally feel your pain.  I remember when I was 12 and had no idea what cellulite was or that I was doomed to one day look at my legs and literally think “eeewww”

But before I show you some easy ways to reduce the look of cellulite I wanted to take a minute and rant about how The Rules have hurt us (women with cellulite) over the years.

Win the Battle or Lose the War?

Now, I’m not usually the first person to shout “that’s not fair.”  But with cellulite I’m happy to stand on the tallest building and scream my head off for the bullshit of it all. Not because some woman are genetically more likely to have it than others, but simply because I don’t understand why we all hate it so much.

Beauty comes in all sizes, not just size 5. ~Roseanne

When did this happen?  I’m pretty sure the cave women didn’t run around worrying if their upper thighs had small lines, blemishes, or random indentations. And yet, today many of us spend millions of dollars on exercise machines, skin creams, and special diets that might – MIGHT- reduce (not get rid of but just reduce) the look of cellulite.

Having cellulite doesn’t mean you are skinny or not, healthy or not, past your prime or not (NOBODY is past their prime in my book).  In fact, almost every woman over 25 I know has some sort of cellulite, somewhere…not because I spend my time inspecting for it, but because every woman I know eventually tells me where it is.  I can be sure that somebody feels comfortable with me after we’ve had the dreaded “so where is your cellulite” conversation.

And even though I don’t believe it’s fair, I can’t help but dislike the look and feel of my own cellulite.  So let’s do ourselves a favor, ladies, and stop thinking of cellulite as something that was our punishment for past sins. In fact, I try to imaging that my cellulite is actually just a couple of cute, but misplaced dimples.  And dimples never bothered anybody (okay, rant over)

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it. ~Confucius

Fight The Good Fight

So now, how do you deal with your body dimples so that you feel like the sexy, fabulous minx that you are?

Well, I don’t recommend fishnets, simply because they make things much to slippery for pole dancing.  (If you are giving a luscious chair dance however, then ROCK those fishnets until he’s drowning in your nets)

TIP #1

My favorite fishnet alternative is BodyStrings which I wrote about here and here. They are a slip free way to focus attention onto some colorful costume accessories, cover up anything you feel shy about, and make you look HOT HOT HOT.

TIP #2

You can also consider spray on nylons. (I totally just heard you say WTF? Spray on nylons, such as Nyce Legs, are a little know stripper secret that give you just enough extra color to hide or smooth out the look of spider veins, cellulite, or other body dimples.  Strippers also use them to cover up an accidental bruise (a hazard most pole dancers know) or hide small tattoos.

Now I don’t recommend these for daily use, simply because I prefer organic and natural products, but I do have them in my cupboard for performances & showcases.  However, you should test them out first.  Some woman still find them a bit slippery, but they work pretty well for me as long as I make sure they are very dry before curtain time.

TIP #3

My last tip is probably my favorite however.  Did you know that the look of cellulite INCREASES whenever you tighten the muscles of your butt or thighs. Walk yourself over to a mirror and take a look as you flex the area you are worried about.  You’ll see what I mean.

So, if you simply practice your pole and exotic dance moves while keeping your ass relaxed, nobody will ever know you’ve got such cute body dimples.  Plus, if you always keep a slight bend in the leg (instead of flexing your leg) facing your audience, the skin on your thighs will stay nice and taut.

And finally, make sure to always point your toes whenever you bend at the hips. Actually, always, always point your toes while dancing PLEASE. (Flexing instead of pointing, which we call PORN FOOT in my classes, is one of my major pet peeves) Pointing your feet causes an extension of the lower calf and stretches the muscles making your legs look, long, strong, and down to get the friction on (courtesy of Sir Mix A Lot)

So, you’ve got lots of options to help you resolve those sweet body dimples, but just remember…

There’s nothing wrong with you, EXACTLY as you are.

The most beautiful view is the one you share with me. ~Author Unknown

Is beauty a battle for you? How do you remind yourself of how beautiful you are? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!

The world we live in isn’t black and white, it’s in vivid, breathtaking, awe inspiring color. But sometimes I wish it wasn’t.  Sometimes I wish my daily decisions were as simple as.. Yes OR No.. up OR down.. this OR that.

When there are too many options, too many possibilities, I get overwhelmed and stuck.  Which of the gazillion things that I could choose is the RIGHT one and how do I know for sure? Do I always have to weigh each possibility in disgusting detail?  Do I really have to agonize and worry over every damn little thing in my life?

As a physicist, I know that mankind has made a science out of redefining our infinite world of possibilities using small little ONEs and ZEROs.  Every movie we watch, every blog we read, every song we download is created from boiling this reality down to those two options. It’s not perfect. Computer simulated red will never be as luscious as the flaming red of a real sunset, but I am still grateful for it.

I want to harness this uniquely human power to SIMPLIFY. Because I have questions that I am tired of pondering.  Tired of thinking about.  Tired of being frozen with indecision about instead of moving forward and taking some fucking action.  I have questions that need answers whether the sun sets red, orange, or a deep royal purple (I live in LA, so yes, sometimes it’s purple!)

So, sometimes, I use my pole dancing as a magic eight ball.  You know, those plastic balls filled with inky black water and the little window where your fortune pops up… “My sources say yes” or “Don’t count on it” (in an oh so very scientific fashion).  When my conscious mind refuses to come up with the answers, I can let my pole dancing magic eight ball decide instead.

“But you’re a physicist?” you cry “How can you ignore the entire scientific method?”

Because the magic eight ball I’m about to show you, taps into your unconscious mind.  If your conscious mind is lost, your unconscious mind has the navigation package and it’s desperately trying to tell you to “take a right at the next exit.” But it’s unconscious (by definition), so unless you find a way to tap into it, you won’t hear a damn thing.  All the while it’s screaming…  TURN RIGHT!  TURN RIGHT NOW!

Now stick with me here, because this is the tricky part…..

Become your own Magic Eight Ball

1. Go pick two (or three) colors to represent your options. My favorite scenario is BLACK meaning NO WAY! and WHITE meaning ALL SIGNS POINT TO YES!  (other meanings might be ABSOLUTELY, MY SOURCES SAY NO, or OUTLOOK GOOD. You can even use GREY for REPLY HAZY, TRY AGAIN LATER)
2. Create a sexy poledancing outfit with your two (or three) colors. In the video I chose a white tank top, white bikini top, black booty shorts, black and white bodystrings, and black platform shoes (see, I told you I used bodystrings ALL THE TIME).
3. Dance and Strip. Yes, you heard me STRIP.  Take off your clothes, but let your unconscious mind decide what pieces to remove and how to remove them. (I did NOT actually remove clothes in the video because it got a little too hot for youtube and I didn’t want to upset your delicate disposition)
4. The color you are wearing more of at the end of your poledancing session is your answer. (I was wearing all BLACK at the end, but just barely, so I got my answer –> NO WAY!  )

Becoming your own magic eight ball means you are trusting your intuition. 

Which is a good thing, because your intuition knows everything you think you know… everything you actually know… a bunch of shit you forgot that you know… and a bunch more shit you don’t even realize that you know.

At the very least, when you are done, you can leave me a comment and say “Yannori, you are full of shit, but I love you anyway.” Because you’re awesome and you roll like that.

How do you tap into your intuition? How do you make a difficult decision? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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Halloween will soon be upon us and I find myself rediscovering all the playful costume additions that are ready and waiting for a week of scary naughty nights.  Since many of you ladies have asked me exactly what is in my bag-o-tricks, I thought I’d share my absolute favorite pole dancer tested & approved accessories.

I first discovered most of these beauties during my monthly forays into the wilds of Hollywood Blvd in downtown Los Angeles. There is a special section just east of Highland (approximately 10 city blocks long) that is filled with tattoo parlous, cheap souvenir shops, tired tourists that wandered too far from Grauman’s Chinese theater, and the absolute best exotic dance clothing and shoe shops on the planet.  Seriously, these places are amazing and the clothing runs from super cheap to super chic.  You can get custom made bikinis for 20 bucks or custom made boots with Swarovski crystals for $1000 and up.  I don’t buy g-strings from anywhere else.

However, there are a couple of online stores where you can procure my favorite pole dance attire as well, so for those of you that don’t have a shopping trip to the city of movie stars planned anytime soon, I’ll include links wherever I can.

1.  Body Strings

I could sing the praises of body strings to the world.  These dirt cheap stretchy lengths of nylon fabric are just the leftover ends of costumes that didn’t make it to the showroom floor.  But you can wrap your legs, arms, torso, or any other exposed body part for a beautiful criss crossing accent of every luscious curve. You can use them to hold up your hair and then seductively set it free during a performance.  I constantly use them to safely secure an annoying pair of platform heels and keep them from shifting during a dance (critical advice if you want to avoid flying stripper shoes, and you do!).  Make sure and get two of each color (they sell them in singles) to have an infinite combination of twisty sexy fun!

2.  Fabric Scarves

I have been using scarves in my pole dancing improvisation since I first started learning this beautiful movement over 6 years ago.  They have the ability to add so many different elements depending on what kind you like and how you use them.  First, just a basic soft silk scarf whether it is long or relatively short can add a splash of color & a flowing element instantly to any dance. I use it to accentuate movements to my audience or tickle my own skin with it’s liquid-like texture.   And of course, you can cover any exposed curves that you wish to use to tease your audience or yourself.  You can even spray it with your favorite perfume to create a deeper emotional connection to your memories through scent.

Oh, and if you ever feel the need to restrain your audience (during a lapdance where he refuses to sit on his hands for example) then the scarf is a perfect way to keep those wandering hands safely tucked away. I’ve even seen boas & neckties used in a similar manner when necessary.  Oh the joy of audience participation!

3.  Boots

Yes, these to me are not just an alternative for shoes.  Although some pole dancers use them during each and every practice session, I consider them a prop that adds an extra bit of sweet, sweet Ginger (my version of the naughty girl in all of us).  First, don’t just throw on a pair and hope that you can dance in them.  Boots require extra caution and plenty of practice to understand how to work with the layer of sticky pleather that can slow down your spins but rocket your climbs & inverts to the level of spiderwoman. I like shiny black thigh highs for nights when I’m feeling powerful and predatory, but a pair of red go-go boots can’t be beat for a stomping good time.

4.  Lace or Mesh CoverUp

If you want to discover the best piece of clothing that adds mystery while keeping the dancer cool and saucy, then pick up one of these. Although they don’t actually hide anything from view, they provide a saucy layer of fabric to slide your hands seductively over your curves and tug & remind your audience of your (lack of) clothing.  And if you choose one that has a silver or metallic thread, you’ll find your body sparkles like a starlet on the dimly lit dance floor.  Plus, you always have the option to remove them if they hamper your movement & toss them at your audience for added effect.

5.  Legwarmers

Alright, I have to admit that some people hate this leftover fashion statement from the Jane Fonda era of exercise, but I am truly a big fan.  Although it does take some extra practice to figure out how to climb and hold advanced inverts while wearing leg warmers, I believe it is worth the effort.  For me, I get the benefit of warm calves that look hot, without having to put on a pair of heels or boots.  Plus, these babies slide.  So all my floor work becomes more fluid, more streamlined, and just more sensual overall.  I feel that legwarmers give me more freedom to move and explore the different textures of dance. Maybe they can do the same for you.

6.  Masks

Ah, the power of anonymity.  I will tell you a secret that I’ve never spoken to a soul before; I have never felt more electric energy coursing through my body than during a masked performance.  Holding your audience in suspense, wondering if you’ll take off the mask and reveal your face (even if they know what you look like) is a invigorating experience that I believe every dancer should have at least once. And Halloween is the perfect chance.  Make sure to pick a mask that is comfortable but won’t fall apart while you slink and slide (venetian masks are perfect for this!).  I prefer ones that only cover my eyes and that tie in the back so I have the choice of exposing my true self or not.  And make sure you avoid masks with too many feathers or sharp corners so that you don’t accidentally catch yourself or distract from your deliciously hidden dance.

7.  Hats

Let me just say that I LOVE HATS.  I have seen hats transform my students from a rocker chick into a tantalizing tease, from a sensual siren into a Betty booty. Everybody dances different when they put on a hat….as long as you remember one little rule — keep the hat on your body or in your peripheral vision.  You want to keep your emotions and your audience focused on how you react to the hat. Does it make you feel flirty to cover you face & your lovely curves?  Does it make you feel strong to look out from underneath the brim and catch someones eye?  Or maybe it’s just one of those dances where you take off everything… Except for the hat!

Try one prop or try them all, and I’m sure you’ll find something that will change (or possibly revolutionize) your pole dancing practice.  Plus, you never know what will spark your creative fire.

Just remember…

YOU connect a series of movements into a dance.

YOU own the authentic mesmerizing sensuality.

YOU hold the key to a powerful expression of life in this moment.

…An accessory is just a little bit of frosting, but YOU take the cake.

PS – The subject & title of this post came from a tweet by the lovely miss Angela (@Angee514)

What’s your favorite pole dancing accessory? What store is your favorite guilty shopping pleasure? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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