I’m not stopping.  Not tonight, not next year, not next month or ever.  In fact, I’ve made it my personal mission to use pole and exotic dancing to teach other woman how phenomenally beautiful and SEXY they already are. But the truth is that pole dancing is just the medium.  Every woman is amazing before I teach her a single twirl…before they take their first spin around the pole…before their hips ever move in the smallest of circles.

Every woman has an inherent sensual power. She carries it with her everywhere.  Ready to be unleashed in the kitchen, the boardroom or the bedroom.  It’s her choice.

What pisses me off, is that sometimes we as woman forget we’ve got it.  The cookie. The thing that makes our lovers stand up and beg for buttermilk.  I’m not sure when or where we stopped feeling that sensual animal inside, but I do know that if you don’t feel it, you’ve got to find it.  You’ve got to get the animal back.  She’s the source of your power and she’s sitting in the shadows asking what in the hell you’re waiting for…..

I can’t tell you exactly where she is, but I can tell you where she isn’t.  She isn’t at the top of the corporate ladder pretending to be a man at the head of the table.  I don’t mean you shouldn’t KICK-ASS at work.  And I definitely don’t mean you shouldn’t lead.  You should KICK-ASS at work, you can KICK-ASS at work, and you probably do KICK-ASS at work.  But not by trying to be “as good as a man.”  You already are an amazing woman, so why bother trying to be “a man.” I may never meet you and yet, I know this as ABSOLUTE TRUTH.

Have you ever noticed how exhausted you get trying to “beat men at their own game.” Yes, I know you can do it, but personally, I’ve found that playing the game like a man wears me down faster than the other guys.  They wake up at 6am ready to go (or is that just morning wood?) and I get more and more tired.

The problem isn’t that we are too weak, or too feminine, or too fragile because we are women.  The problem is that it’s just not our damn game. That game is meant to be played with a penis and, I don’t know about you, but I just don’t have one of those, nor do I want one. So, tomorrow, when you wake up, instead of getting ready to play their game one more fucking time, make the decision to change the rules.

Listen to your instincts, listen to your heart, and stop asking permission to be sexy.  Wear skirts if you’ve got great legs.  Wear pants if you’ve got a great butt.  Sway your hips ever so slightly when you walk.  Smile with the knowledge that you’ve got something the men around you don’t have, can’t have, and want BADLY.  Don’t apologize for loving the way you love, for caring the way you care, or for having hips, tits and an ass. Because I guarantee the men around you won’t ever apologize for having a penis.

Practice walking the halls at work (or the grocery store), turning your sensual power on and off, on and off.  Notice how people will start to watch you, open the door for you, give up their seat at the conference table for you.  I’m not telling you to flirt shamelessly (unless that’s what YOUR sensual animal wants).  I’m telling you to let the power of being a woman flow through you.

Remember, your body is made for creation– a beautiful expression of the living breathing world around you. The moment you accept that power and the responsibility that goes with it, you will feel that sensual ebb and flow…. You will BE that sensual ebb and flow. And the people around you, both men and woman, will respond.   They will respect you more for being a woman who enjoys being a woman. Men will feel more alive and be more authentic with you.  Other woman will be more connected to you.  It won’t be an instant utopia, but it will be a deeper alignment between you and the life you want to live.

So whatever you do, don’t apologize for being soft, for being sensual, for sometimes needing to cry for no reason at all. Don’t apologize for having an opinion or doing something different than everybody else.  Don’t apologize for playing like a woman, for starting up a new game, with new rules…. Especially if you are winning!

And don’t EVER apologize for pole dancing.

How do you express your sensual feminine self? When do you feel the most connected with the world? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!

Pole dancing is a recent addition to the US fitness industry but there have already been numerous sport specific injuries.  Just type “pole dancing accident” into any YouTube or Google browser.

Greg Welch M.S, a physiologist and the owner of Specifit, believes that the most likely injuries from pole dancing can occur at the rotator cuff, a group of small muscles that surround and protect the shoulder ball and cuff socket.

Overuse is the #1 reason for injury.  Physical performance… requires training to prevent injury — Greg Welch

Here’s my Sensual Girls Guide to the six questions you should ask your instructor to ensure she is up to date about pole dancing fitness and safety.

1. Does she have a current Fitness Certification?

Although it’s not a requirement in every US state, a group fitness or personal training certification is essential for any fitness instructor.  American Council on Exercise (ACE) and Aerobics and Fitness Association of America (AFAA) are two of the most common US fitness organizations.  They require certified instructors to prove their fitness knowledge with written and demonstrative testing. All US certifications also require the instructor to maintain an understanding of current fitness research, and trends, through continuing education.
Benefit to you: Your instructor will help you avoid common fitness injuries with a proper warm-up, muscle specific stretching, and knowledge of first aid techniques.

2.  Does she have a Pole Dancing Certification or License?

Besides a fitness certification, your instructor should have a pole dancing license or certification.   Many pole specific licensing programs include the basic pole dancing spins and safety techniques.  Some also include 100 mentoring hours with a master instructor to ensure the new teacher learns successful training methods.  There are multiple pole dancing instructor workshops available that are supported by current fitness organizations.  Both AFAA and ACE offer Pole Dancing Fitness and Safety continuing education for instructors.I am a Licensed Level 1 & 2 PoleCat Power Method instructor which includes the AFAA recognized workshops for Pole Dance Skills and Injury Prevention.
Benefit to you: Your pole dancing classes will be taught using a proven method that has worked safely and effectively for hundred of students.

3. Does she have a strong safety focus?

Pole dancing is based on spinning around a pole with your feet off the ground.  That makes it an aerial art form with all the beauty and possible injuries from falling.  Your instructor should understand aerial dance and pole spotting techniques as well as have alternative modifications for students with a wide variety of fitness levels. She should also use proper safety equipment, such as pole mats and grip aids.
Benefit to you: Your instructor will provide a safe environment, quality equipment, and be able to adjust or fully support your weight during a difficult trick.

4.  Does she know poles?

There are at least a dozen manufactures that sell poles made from different materials, in different diameters, at different heights, with different features, and different mounting requirements.  Manufactures vary widely as do the quality and safety of their poles. Your instructor should be aware of the most common pole variations and be able to explain the features and benefits of each type. Check out my post on How To Buy a Dancing Pole for specific details about poles.
Benefit to you: You instructor can help you choose a safe, professional pole for your personal practice at home or away from the studio.

5. Is she committed to continuous pole training?

Even with the continuing education requirements of a fitness certification, your instructor should be constantly training.  A professional instructor will maintain a personal focus on greater mastery of aerial pole dance, weight training, flexibility, and cardio endurance.  Your instructor should also have an understanding of the far reaching background of pole dancing. This includes the circus and aerial acrobatics, contemporary and fosse jazz dancing, gymnastics, yoga, hip-hop club dancing, belly dancing, sensual movements, aerobic fitness, exotic or erotic dancing, and so much more. I’ll be posting The History of Pole Dancing soon!

Teaching is not training, so instructors must keep training — Greg Welch

Benefit to you: By expanding her knowledge and abilities in pole dancing, sensual feminine movement, and in other fitness genres, your instructor will always have fresh material and new techniques to teach at every class.

6.  Does she create a fun learning atmosphere?

A professional pole dancing instructor will have a complete lesson plan for each class that guides students to develop playful, safe mastery of each pole trick, transition, and technique. Most great instructors encourage students to use mistakes as learning opportunities and use auditory, visual, and kinesthetic (experiential) methods to reach everyone in class.  Your instructor should maintain a polite and respectful attitude and ask students before hands-on spotting or stepping into their personal space.

Plus, the studio should have enough poles for students to practice and rest as required.  Greg Welch recommends “a one to three work to recovery ratio is a great place to start interval training,”  so no more than three students per pole.
Benefit to you: You get a phenomenal learning experience with plenty of positive encouragement, a friendly class commradarie, and just the right amount of pole time.

With the right instructor, your Pole Dancing class will be a Fun & Safe way to get fit and explore your passionate, feminine soul.

PS. Please contact me if you are looking for a professional pole dancing instructor in your area.  I may be able to help.

What qualities do you like in an instructor? What additional training do you think a pole dance instructor should have? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!

A Quality Pole

First off, lets get you excited, meaning all hot and bothered, about buying that 8 foot tall (or more!) floor to ceiling shiny metal pole.  Believe me, the first time you wrap your hands around the perfect circumference of polished metal with the knowledge that it’s yours and your alone, you’ll absolutely understand why I’ve got three poles at home.

A pole is an investment in your health and fitness, as well as an outlet for your sensuality, so take some time browsing the different types of materials, sizes, surface finishes and spinning or static versions.  And always buy from a professional pole manufacturer that uses high quality materials and manufacturing methods.  Although you may find these to be a little more expensive than the cheap “toy” poles (avoid the Electra Pole and the Peek A Boo Pole), the reputable manufacturers listed below also have good customer service to keep your new baby in perfect working order.

Titanium, Brass, and Steel… Oh My!

Yes ladies, you’ve got your pick of materials.  Depending on the manufacturer, you’ll find poles made of three different materials.

• Stainless Steel has a lovely polished silver sheen but a slightly slippery grip when new (see my pole FAQ article for tips to work in your pole).
• Chrome has a great ready to use surface right out of the box. They are both easy to clean and usually the cheapest option available.
• Titanium Gold (TG) comes in a beautiful dusty gold finish and a grip worth raving about, but you have to be a little careful when you clean it and it’s definitely on the more pricey side.
• Brass, when new, looks like (you guessed it) brass.  Give it a month of two of good use though, and you’ll start to see it’s surface tarnished from skin oils.  Brass is moderately expensive, and must be cleaned often to keep it hygienically clean, but it provides the perfect grip surface once its worked in.  This is why it is the original material used for poles in most Strip Clubs.

I can hear you crying, “Which one do I choose?”  Most beginners and advanced enthusiasts alike find that either stainless steel or chrome is really the best bang for your buck.  It’s the best way to ensure that, after training on your home pole, you’ll be comfortable spinning on any pole you find in the Sensual Girl’s Wilderness of dance clubs, pole dancing studios, and the occasional date with a Fireman (Thats Hot!).

A Painted Pole

Once you start perusing, you’ll might discover that some pole manufacturers offer a painted pole option.  Believe it or not, your pole can arrive painted in the mysterious shade of flat black, the playful shade of pink, the vamp shade of red, and, for the truly adventurous…faux-flames. (yes, really!)  In fact, you can even work with the manufacturer for any custom paint job.  Although many notable ladies of pole have started with painted poles, very few find this option to be optimal.  The paint does increase the grip, but I’ve found them to be a little too kitschy for me. And any small scratch can cause a serious problem later, whether its flaking paint or a painful metal gouge you can’t buff out, leaving your pole unusable (boo, hiss, cry).

The All Important Issue of Girth

The standard diameter size of most poles is 50mm or approximately 2 inches.  However, since every woman is different, pole manufacturers realized that they have to provide an option for those ladies with smaller hands.  And the 45mm (~1.5 inches) diameter pole was born.  Here’s the short of it, if you’ve got tiny hands and the only pole you plan on using is the one at home, consider buying the 45mm option.

To Spin or Not To Spin

Goodness, there’s still more to say about poles (I could truly type all day, but I know you want to get on with buying one!).  Your standard static pole is just like a pipe that runs from floor to ceiling.  You’ll be twirling around it, but the pole never rotates.  However, some manufacturers sell poles with static and spinning options.  That means that the pole is mounted on a special smooth rotation mount inside the pole, and the outer pole can spin freely (clockwise or counter clockwise) once the locking pin is released.

Personally, I’m a static pole girl, but I love having the spinning pole option when I need a day of true centrifugal acceleration (that what creates the force you feel pulling you away from the center when you spin round and round).

Follow Your Feelings

So, there are three major pole manufacturers out there, and they all offer some variation of the pole materials, sizes, surfaces, and spin options I’ve listed.  Peruse all three (they are linked below) just to get a feel for things and pay attention to which features thrill and excite you more than the others.

• Do you love the silver surface of the stainless steel or the smaller diameter size? – Choose the LilMynx Standard
• Do you want a static pole & one that rotates like a fabulous spinning top? – Choose the Chrome or Titanium Xpole
  
• Do you want a flaming pipe to twirl on in your guest bedroom? – Choose the custom painted LilMynx
• Do you want a brass pole for the best grip on the planet? – Choose a PoleDanzer Brass Pole
  

Just listen for your amorous heart to call out for one of them.

When I took this step, I started with the basic Lil Mynx (a good beginner’s pole), but quickly upgraded to the Standard 50mm Xpole .  It gave me all the options; static or spinning with the turn of two screws, the best grip surface right out of the box, portability, and easy height variations.  They also have great customer service and a warranty.  In fact, I love this pole so much, I have three! (two stainless and one titanium).

Remember, a little risque goes a long way!

So, which one did you choose and why? Share your ideas in the comment section.

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!