Sometimes your creative Muse is motivated, playful, filled with wild hip swaying, booty bumping energy.  Sometimes your Muse can’t wait to Dance, Dance, Dance.  Sometimes she has a love crazed hard-on (yes, I said it. Get over it.) to grab that pole and make the world beg for more.   And sometimes she couldn’t give a shit.

Sometimes, she looks at that shiny vertical shaft of steel (or titanium, or brass, or chrome) and all she can think about is how cold it probably is right now.  How she’ll have to pull out the yoga mat to warm up.  How tired she is. Or how long it would take to change out of her damn pajamas and into her booty shorts, tank, leg warmers, 6 inch heels, and sexy cover-up, let alone find all those things in her closet.  Le Sigh!

So instead, she decides to skip her workout and visit Twitter for a few last minute tweets before bed… and maybe a stop on youtube for a quick pole video from one of her favorite Sensualistas… and then over to Amazon to pick up that new awesome album by Adele…

But something happens.

Something unexpected, especially since she’s wearing slippers, a pink heart covered pajama shirt, and nothing remotely practical. A tingle, a tickle, an urge to move, travels slowly up her spine.  Now, the Muse is no stranger to random movement and assumes it’s just a simple reaction to Adele’s luscious voice singing “Turning Tables”  and “Set Fire to the Rain.”  But as one song leads to another, leads to another, she starts to feel constrained. Her body is too tight, with her legs folded and spine bent squarely, resting on the office chair. Her mind attempts to protest, “Dancing in slippers is simply too ridiculous, and, well, too  slippery.”  But the mind is too tired to put up a fight and the Muse, recognizing the unconscious call of passion, uncoils from it’s dark cave and says “Why the fuck not!”

The Muse still doesn’t give a shit; about training or warm-ups or working her abs or building her strength or any of that practical crap. It’s 10pm at night for goodness sake, and she’s tired.  But that doesn’t mean she’s uninspired.  In fact, now is her chance… to be Deliberately Lazy, Deliciously Dirty, Undeniably Sexy for no damn reason other than she fucking feels like it.

The conscious mind pops out of it’s sleepy stupor to remind the Muse that she’s in no position to be making difficult demands like inverting or pole ups and then goes back to sleep.  But the Muse has no need for difficult tricks.  She just wants to MOVE, BE, BREATH.  The Muse wants to remind us to Live in the Moment because it’s the only one we’ve got.

And so she slinks. Over to the pole for slow, delicious, pelvic circles that take forever.  No, longer than forever.

She slides over to the wall (even easier than usual thanks to her slippery slippers) and paints passion into the air.

Breathing deeply, living for movement, tugging on those pink heart pajamas, dragging her fingers through her hair.

Dancing with sweetness, dancing with compassion, dancing with the steady, slow energy of the quiet night until she can’t remember her own name.

And when the night changes it’s melody from the cooling tones of Adele to the butt bumping beats of Kanye, Katy Perry, and some kind of ET alien invasion…

She gives in to that too.

Sometimes you have to give in the Muse fully, completely, without fear and simply trust that your body knows exactly what you need, exactly when you need it.

BTW, if you can say the title of this post 10 times fast without messing up (to me live, on the phone or in person), I’ll give you a free 30 min Yoga or Pole Private on Skype. No foolin’! PRACTICE FIRST and then contact me to set up a time or just leave a note in the comments.

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!

Once upon a time…

…there was a beautiful and vivacious woman, although she didn’t usually think so, who was diligently folding the laundry.  It was late, the house was fairly quiet and she was enjoying the time alone, even if she was stuck doing a few domestic chores.

As she slid her fingers across a soft silk bra, one of her favorite songs began to play on the radio.  The deep and luscious beat was hypnotic, seeming to beg her hips to move.

She looked around, smiling at the guilty thoughts playing across her mind, and gave in to the music. Slowly, slowly, allowing her hips to shift and tilt, turn and grind, circle and shake. She let the laundry drop from her hands and brushed her fingers through her hair. Such softness, such a tingle as she soothed the pressure points along her skull and caressed her lovely cheeks.

Suddenly she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror, and stopped. Surprised by the sensual smile on her own lips, the sexy curve of her hips, the acceptance of her self in her own eyes. She considered stopping, wonderding what would happen if someone caught her in such a precarious position.  But the song pushed through her senses, it’s beat too infectious to ignore and she let the mirror’s vision slide from her sight.

Realizing she was simply too warm, she found her fingers tugging at her clothes, pulling down the edges of her pants, lifting the straps of her tank top.  Everything seemed to tickle her, the smooth cotton surrounding her, holding her too tightly.  She needed to move freely, uncontrolled, unconstrained, completely released from emotional and physical boundaries. She knew she had to decide between dancing and clothing, and it was simply to late to stop.  First the shirt, slid over her head and shoulders.  And then the pants, bit by bit, fell from her undulating hips. The air tickled along her exposed skin and a welcome sigh escaped her lips.

When her legs began to shake from such playful exertions, she fell backwards onto the bed.  Her feet dangled, then swung from side to side, and finally kicked in a happy tantrum, feeding off the passion of the singer’s voice. The sheets were soft and easy to slide along as she rolled and twisted, moving slowly, deliberately, yet giving in to the emotions curling through her mind. She wondered again, how sensual her lips might look, lying on the bed with her tush in the air.  She decided a peek at herself wouldn’t hurt and looked over her shoulder at the mirror again.

The sight that greeted her almost brought tears.  Her body glistened; glowed with vitality and the feminine form.  Every curve melded seamlessly, sensually into the next with an easy grace– even the ones she had never liked before. For once, her body seemed happy, her mind content with the sight of herself, without needless worry, without misplaced shame.  Perfect and whole as she’d always been without having to change a thing.

She sighed as the song released it’s final notes and winked at her own reflection. Letting the memory of her movement, her honest beauty, her sensuality be captured and held.  She finally understood that she was truly sexy, and vowed to remember this fact today and every day after.  Perhaps all that she needed was to dance naked…. right after she finished the laundry.

A Call To Action

I invite you to discover your own hidden dancer.  The one you hide from while you do the laundry or get ready for bed.  Forget about the pole, forget about special clothes, forget about everything but the song and the feeling of being in your body, in your breath, in this exact moment.  You don’t need anything special, except your amazing self, perfect and whole exactly as you are.

Sexy is a realization, a state of mind that you are amazing just as you are. Simply choose a song and let the music infect you with it’s passion.  Or better yet, use a song to transform your body into pure emotion.  Let creativity, truth, and sensuality be your guide.  Let go of your worries for the length of just one song and you’ll soon see that they will never be as important, as alive as you are when you dance with your whole self.

Give in to passion, give in to life, give in to love…. and you may soon find yourself dancing naked.

Just try it, even if it takes a glass or two of wine.  I dare you to Dance (almost) Naked and rediscover how surprisingly sexy you really are. Please share your anonymous and not-so-anonymous thoughts in the comments.

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!

Last night, I put on my thigh high zebra socks, a teeny tiny skirt and matching triangle bikini top.  I slid and dragged, lifted and popped, circled and shook — until the air shimmered with my warm breath.  The room was dark, tinged with red.  The music was heavy, beating with the rhythm of the earth and my heart.  The pole was shiny and glorious, as it should be.

The rest of the world fell away.  No more worries.  No more bills.  No more work.  No more drama or bullshit.  Just me and the heat of the moment.

The where, the when, the how, and especially the why — don’t apply anymore.  I wouldn’t have it any other way.

This is my time to tease life into being. A time when my body knows exactly what to do and my brain disappears in mindless movement.  It’s my time to be a woman filled with soft thoughts.  To be a rocker chick who just needs to shake her hair.  Eventually, time disappears, lost in translation between body, soul, and dance.

I let my toes drag and take a step, shifting my weight to settle against the walls.  Slowly, slowly, letting my body drip down to the floor.  I move along every surface, letting my fingers barely touch the edges.  I paint the room with my essence and settle into my true self.  It feels as if the dance becomes me and we disappear into each other.

Sensual dance arouses your true self out of it’s logic bound cage.

You feel compelled to explore the world around you, though sensation, through experience, through sound and motion.  Without the prison of thought, life becomes an infinite moment extending out for eternity, with the joy of your senses to guide you step by step.  You realize that you can’t force your sensual nature, you must tease and tickle it, hold it in rapture with a nuzzle and a wink.  If you are willing, you can open your body to the dark places in order to find the light within.  It’s hiding because it likes to play, counting the moments until you find it, with a delicious pounce and a barrage of giggles.

You can’t depend on someone else to discover your sensual self.

It’s a game where nobody but you knows the rules.

Anyone can show you the technique. Anyone can demonstrate the trick. Anyone can direct your body and guide your thoughts…. but only you can accept the emotions that arise.  The power of life is to show you the puzzle and ask if you wish to solve it.  It takes courage to embrace and accept every part of your true self because there will always be parts that you don’t know…. yet.

You can’t know the future.  You can only see the glimmer of your soul when you let go of the past, and give in to the full experience of this moment.

What are you waiting for?

This is your personal invitation to dance, to live, to beckon and blow kisses in the wind, to tease the world until it gives you exactly what you want.

It’s time to throw on your silky thigh high nylons, your red heels, or nothing at all and wink back.   It’s time to dance, NOW!

How do you tap into your sensual nature & what does it feel like? Please share your opinions in the comment section.

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!

I was lamenting on the state of the pole dancing industry when someone asked me why I focus so strongly on being a pole DANCER instead of a pole TRICKSTER (someone who focuses on athletic pole tricks without transitions).

Although I recognize how wonderful pole fitness can be when a woman develops her gymnastic ability and strength, I am not in that camp.  I do not and will not ever just teach a pole trick.  I believe it is the transitions between the tricks that connect a woman with her sensual nature, not just the trick itself. If I cannot evoke an emotional response throughout my dance, then I’m not interested in dancing; and serial pole tricks do not evoke emotion in me.

Whenever I see a pole Trickster, I find my mind wandering.  Yes, the flawless execution is impressive.  Yes, the difficulty is obvious.  But it’s still the same tricks, over and over and over again.  Instead of noticing the way she accentuates the curve of her hip or the luscious shadow of the hair falling down her back, I consider her gymnastic execution; her fitness & stretching routine, her training regimen.  Of course she is beautiful, impressive even, but I want to see the movement of life breathing through her, the spark of humanity, the hypnotic fire of creativity that burns through a dancer. I know it’s there, but I just can’t see it.

I certainly agree that being a pole Trickster is a great way to get in shape.  It’s a phenomenal and powerful activity that many awesome and wonderful woman do with their bodies.  But it’s not what I want.  And to answer the question of why, I wrote this response to a friend of mine.  It’s rather raw, and starts off with a doozy, but if you wanted butterflies and lily pads, you probably wouldn’t be reading my blog anyway.

Fuck pole dancing, but not in the way you think.

The pole is a prop, a gimmick.  It’s the feeling of pure sensuality that I am after.  The afterglow of the dance is like the afterglow of sex.  I want to feel beautiful, luscious, delicious.  Circles of erotic bliss.  I want the space to be vulnerable again.

I tire of being hard. Hard at work, hard at home, hard in traffic. I am not a man and have no wish to be.  I am the force that bends instead of breaks; the life that flows instead of shatters.  My heart is transparent because my tears fill it’s soul.

Being at work fights my nature. No, I fight my nature when I’m at work.  My lover requests for my return to dance.  He wishes to see what only a woman in raw movement can show him.  But this vision, this truth is available only when a woman remembers herself.  She experiences life with flaws, weaknesses, strength, mistakes, emotions, and creation.

Reality is not about perfection; this is man’s lie, one he tells himself.  The sun, moon, and stars have NEVER given us perfection, only natural cosmic coincidence.  All things work in harmony because of their inherent chaos.

You want proof?  –  I am proof.

I am a living contradiction, strength and weakness personified in one body.  A living mass of confusion that somehow remains in balance and lives — breathes even.  Whereas a rock, a flawless diamond with the most intricate and perfect structure, highly prized for this logical and regular pattern of atoms, lacks a soul.

The one requirement of life is that it is NEVER perfect, never done.  No matter how many times it has tried, life must continue the struggle or give up.

Enjoy your struggle, your dance of sensuality, and recognize the amount of passion you nurture to be truly ALIVE each and every day.

Do You disagree? Share your ideas in the comment section.

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!

Ah yes, the many and various ways of moving across the dance floor without walking, strutting, or twirling.  Crawling, is so much more than the dictionary definition would imply…

“1 : to move slowly in a prone position without or as if without the use of limbs 2 : to move or progress slowly or laboriously”

Crawling is usually done slowly in a crouched or prone position…  But there is so much raw sensuality inherent in crawling. I feel so powerful while crawling that it’s easy to imagine I’m an animal stalking my prey.  So, I only use it when I have a very specific and appreciative audience.

I’m a major stickler for details when it comes to crawling because I’ve had so many students come to me with knee injuries and shoulder pain from doing it incorrectly.  But we’re going to fix all that right now.  So let’s get into the nitty gritty of the Slinky Crawl…

Get Down On It

First, in order to crawl you have to be down on the floor.  Now, don’t just rush down to the floor. Take a little extra time with this particular transition.  The most often used movement is a variation of the slinky squat, but my personal favorite is a slide.  Slide down the pole, slide down the wall, slide down a chair, slide down your partner (don’t be afraid of a little audience participation, ROWR!)

Simply place your back on the pole/wall/partner and your hands in a supporting position (usually above your head gripping the pole, pushing on the wall, or gently holding onto his neck) so you can control your slide.  Plant one foot on the ground while allowing the other foot to slide in front & away from you.  (If you have knee issues I can help you find a different variation that doesn’t require a deep knee bend like this) Remember, to keep your shoulders away from your ears & your abs tight.

Take an agonizingly slow journey to the floor until your tush hits the ground. This is a perfect chance to spend some time flirting with your audience or yourself.  (BTW, I teach at least four different ways to get to the floor in both my level 1 pole and level 1 exotic dance classes plus a gazillion different variations.  This is just one.)

DoggyStyle

Next, you need to get onto your hands and knees.  Again, there are a million different ways to do this, depending upon your level of flexibility, leg covering (ie slideability), and laziness.  I’m a laaazzzyyy dancer, so I like things that look easy even if they are really fucking hard to do.  And since we’re going to focus on crawling, let’s go with the straightforward technique.

At this point, you should be sitting on your butt with your back on the pole/wall/partner.  Just let your body continue to slide until your head is resting on the floor.  Then luxuriously roll onto your belly. (I teach how to roll over sensually as well, but I don’t want to overwhelm you here)

Now, here’s the tricky bit (Are you paying attention?) Press your hands on either side of your chest and open your knees so your legs loosely form a diamond shape. I.E. your knees will be wider than your hips.  This also means you can feel the floor on the soft flesh on the inner side of your knees but NOT on the knee cap.  (you only get two knee caps, so don’t skip this part!) Now push down with your hands as you let your butt move straight backwards toward your feet.  If you pretend somebody you really like is tugging down & back on your g-string, you’ll do exactly what I mean.

Notice that the majority of your weight is on your calves but your knees do NOT hurt.  That your hands, elbows, and shoulders are in line while the back muscles are relaxed and down.  Plus your stomach muscles are nice and tight.  Viola! Welcome to every man’s favorite position for sex. (ahem! oh, was that too risque?  Really? )

Creep, Slither, Crawl

Finally, let’s take your first slink along the floor.  If you are positioned correctly, you’ll feel how easy it is to rock your body away from your hands toward your butt, BUT (teehee) you start to loose your balance if your head & chest go too far forward past your hands.  You’ll also feel how easy it is shift your weight from one leg to the other leg.  Now shift your weight back AND toward one side.  This makes it easy to lift the opposite leg off the floor and slide it closer towards your hand.  Move that hand forward, shift your weight again and slide your leg again.  Make sure you end up on the inner edge of your knee and not the knee cap. (I really recommend wearing Bella pants for this part until you’ve mastered the rolling and sliding motions.)

Then just repeat, repeat, repeat.  When I use this particular crawl, I feel like I’m rocking my butt and sliding my legs.  My hands just keep my upper body balanced for the next step. And to keep things sexy, I make sure I relax my neck, so my hair hides my face and my head sweeps (slowly and easily) from side to side.

Then, when I’m ready to get closer to my audience, I deliberately look up through my hair and lock eyes.  Even if they can’t see your face, they will get a chill from your sensual power in this moment.

When everything is working right, this crawl feels very strong, but looks very slow.  It’s deliberately lazy. You want your audience to focus on your butt swinging from side to side. (I know I would *wink*) This movement can exude both vulnerability, from your prone position, and a direct sensual power, when executed with confidence.

Allow both the music (I love Esthero for the deep sensual beats) and your personal style to infect each sway of your hips, each shift of your sensuous legs. Focus on how the audience responds to you or on how you respond to your surroundings.

Do your feel supported by the earth…

Do you feel the slowly building heat of holding your limbs close and keeping your head lowered…

Do you feel rushed or lazy, soft or dangerous, exposed or predatory…

When you play with the animal inside you discover the freedom to express your authentic, sensual nature.

Let your boundaries go.

Do you usually crawl when you dance? What other variations do you enjoy? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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Twirl, Swirl, and Fly!